It’s Christmas Eve. A few problems, surgery and losses will be a big part of the take–of this year 2009. When will it end I ask? Like a giant tsunami – this year has had one thing after another go wrong. And yet, the experience of living in the now… proves that I can survive it. Not one to be trendy, I discovered facebook and Farmville and dumped them both one day in a fit of simplicity.
One of my friends who feared her own death due to cancer has survived and will be able to quilt with me again soon. As things piled up- in my daily life, (I swear I wasn’t just ignoring them,) I also came to realize, they were but the tide- rising at my feet, and showing me there was truly no way out. I ran, took cover and then realized after the storm, there is sunshine.
Talk about personal growth. I learned about myself, love, life, emotions, had tears of joy and sorrow. Sometimes this happened within just a week. Again, the saltiness in the air made things seem clearer I the end. Also, I continue to eek good things out in the last minutes. Can you say: Work.
I continue to define who I am and also defend it. People around me are a blessing and those I allowed to witness my change- will hopefully come to understand it some day.
Special thank to my girls, who let me grow, to TZ for her mothering, for JL who comes to my door bearing gifts, to the (2Te’s) for being real friends when I was lost, to JM for making me feel loved and needed, to J & M for making me laugh, to1-JM- for making great music, cats who sit still and fall asleep watching me at this keyboard, and to Misty, who is certainly in heaven with her big top dog hat on and is taking a bow from the other dogs as they saw her arrival- for being the best. Why did things end so soon? Thank you CV for the great escape, to new friends, and to my new students who have potential and I can only hope to help direct it.
Only 2010 will know the answers yet to come.
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